Are You Honoring Resolutions? Maybe It's Time For a Change
Honoring resolutions may require a shift in how you frame them
Sitting at my desk early this morning before the light of day, while the rest of my family slumbered, I began a completely different post. And in typical fashion as the house roused below me I was swept up amidst the wave of morning ritual: wake resident teenager for school, feed said teenager, make bed, unload dishwasher, walk dog, etc. As I bustled around, fluffing my duvet and reshuffling the pillows, I glanced down below my bedside table at the piece of medical equipment that kept my father alive for the past 2 ½ years. Recently, my mother brought it to me so I could return it to the hospital for her. It has been less than 5 months since my father’s passing and this miracle machine that kept his heart pumping remained as a last vestige of the arduous journey he had been on.I realized that I had hurriedly placed it in my room and needed to reorganize its lengthy power cords. My battery-operated father used to plug into that machine each night. His constant nightly companion, it remained alongside his bed. As I held the long cords in my hands – I instantly felt him.
These were the cords that had connected to him, that had kept his heart pumping. Tears welled up in my eyes. I missed him deeply in that moment.
These 2 cords had been his lifeline. Was it a coincidence that today was my parent’s wedding anniversary? I think not. He was communicating with me. It was a nod from him. I know it. Aside from probably admonishing me for not keeping the cords as neatly as he had – I know he was connecting to me and saying hello. As I held them in my hands, looking at the empty connectors, I wished he were there - attached to them - and yet I was deeply relieved that he is free of their burden.Nothing is random and yet we glance over the magic of life regularly. I could have glossed over it – missed the kiss from Dad, missed the warm rush of feeling his love in my heart.Are you missing your messages?So we’re in week 2 of the New Year – how are those resolutions and promises to self going? When I held those cords in my hands today I felt a sense of suffocation and constraint that my Dad must have experienced – a feeling similar to when we tether ourselves to commitments or promises we know we can’t or won’t keep.
What if we were to dump the resolutions completely and try a new strategy? In reality, it’s all a matter of semantics.
When we use terms like diet, refrain from, cut back on…we think “restrictive.” What about shining the light on the stuff that feels expansive rather than punitive and confining? How about shifting the focus onto what we want to welcome more of into our lives – more laughter, more travel, more experience, more creativity, more positivity, more “me” time. We can choose to not jump on that resolution bandwagon. As a matter of fact, it would be a far greater gift to self to find a way to insert these promises into your every day, not just your new year – to take a stand for what really feels true to you.What are the things that make you feel alive? If you could image yourself connected to a lifeline what would it be?I have a paperweight on my desk that my friend Lucia painted with the words, “How do you want to feel?” It is my reminder to self that I’m in charge - I get to choose. If you had to identify 5 things you wanted to feel each day, that you would infuse into your every cell, what would they be? For me: love, delight, purpose, passion, radiant. You? If you could find a way to access to those things on a daily basis, chances are that they would pave the way for your life’s magic to roll on in.There are signs all about you – messages from your guardian angels, sprinkles of stardust and wonder. Tap into that. Open your eyes to the possibility that anything is possible. Dad, once bold and vibrant, is now free from his cords. Let’s agree to cut the psychic cords that are no longer serving us in the New Year! That’s a resolution worthy of keeping.