A (not so) funny thing happened on the way to the beach…
A glorious sunrise on my recent beach getaway
Rerouting chaos and finding gratitude and calm in unexpected places
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While away on my recent ‘birthday boondoggle to the beach’, a few quick days in Miami— despite some major travel hiccups on both ends, I was gifted with a chance encounter that felt like a slice of grace and helped me recalibrate. It was my true gift.
Let me set the stage. First off, I try not to take travel (or anything else for that matter) for granted. ‘Try’ being the operative word. Hey, we’re only human, constantly rerouting and we can all get in our own way from time to time. Traveling, even in this post-pandemic world of uncertainty and flight-cancellation chaos and costs…is still a privilege.
Fortunately for me, I had just watched a quick video from my stepson who teaches breathwork where he delivered the message: “Calm = freedom.” Its truth resonated deeply with me and hit me to the core. Yes, calm = freedom. I held onto this…clutched it in fact, as flights were delayed, cancelled, rerouted and crowds grew angry around me…and my mini-vacay was slipping away before my eyes. It would have been easy to have been swept up in that energy and added my own pollution to the already mounting dark cloud. But as I always try to remind myself to ask, What condition do you want to be in when you arrive on the other side?
Honestly, there is no better life metaphor than that. You will eventually land on the other side of any situation, and the conditions surrounding that may be out of your control. However, your reaction to them truly drives the entire experience.
Even after arriving and finally getting my winter feet into the sand, my flip flops were stolen from the beach where I had left them so I could take an early morning walk (on my birthday no less). Deep breath.
Calm = freedom, Kristen, I told myself.
We’ve all been there. We can so easily get rocked off balance on any given day with a cancelled flight here, a disappointment there, an unkind word, a confrontation, toss in some overwhelm, etc. But that’s a slippery slope that we can slide down, allowing our joy to be taken out with it. Remaining calm truly is our ultimate freedom no matter what is thrown at us because this is how we stay in control of our power.
Our wisdom, inner guidance, intuition and peace can only be heard and accessed in that state of calm. I’m not going to toss a bunch of platitudes your way like just “sit in the discomfort of your emotions” or “feel the feelings.” However, I am going to ask you to be curious with yourself and any situation that unfolds before and around you…(and then feel the feels).
Pause and ask yourself a few questions. Can I do anything to change this situation or control it?Is my emotional response to this helping or hurting? Will this meltdown get me on my flight faster, bring back my stolen shoes or solve any problems? If the answer in that moment is No, do yourself a favor…remain calm. It’s a life (and sanity) preserver. Besides, life happens in those in-between moments.
I couldn’t control the airlines or the fact that my shoes had been stolen. I could control my reaction and what I would relinquish to it. I laughed at the absurdity of losing my shoes as I walked back to my hotel room through the lobby barefoot, hoping no one noticed. I thought back to the irony of how one year on my birthday on that very same beach, a $100 bill floated up to shore…I kid you not. This year, my shoes were stolen. Was it a sign? I could’ve felt victimized but instead, sighed and declared that perhaps the person who took them needed them more than me. Besides, I had other shoes and wasn’t handing over my happiness or my birthday to this situation.
A sweet exchange with my housekeeper
Back in my room I suddenly glanced down at my side table and realized that the housekeeper had left me a handwritten note. Earlier that morning before I left for my beach stroll, I ripped a piece of paper out of a notebook and wrote in bright pink happy-colored ink, THANK YOU! (with a smiley face) and left a nice tip. I do this daily when traveling because there is always rotating staff and it’s an opportunity to be kind and make someone else’s day…to whisper appreciation to them through the ethers.
In all of the years I’ve been traveling, tipping and leaving notes…I never received a letter back. But on this day, I did—and it was heartfelt and so full of gratitude. I had not been looking for any result, but every once in a while, when you get to witness your good intentions in motion—it lands like a soul kiss.
I was giddy about the note I had found. Barefoot and all, it had shifted my mood and any slight inclination to feel sorry for myself.
That night as I looked around my birthday dinner table in a delicious restaurant, my heart was smiling. Surprisingly, when dessert came with the obligatory lit birthday candle and ensuing Happy Birthday serenade, I just stared at my plate. Make a wish. Make a wish, I nudged myself. But my mind was blank. Usually, I have a litany of requests, but this time, I just paused, took a deep breath and exhaled as I whispered, THANK YOU God and blew.
It's not that I don’t have wishes, requests, hopes and desires. It’s not that I didn’t wish my travel arrangements had gone more smoothly or that my shoes hadn’t been stolen or that my new business ventures would be wildly successful or that the rest of my life would be filled with rainbows and unicorns, health and happiness. It’s just that God isn’t a short-order cook checking items off a waitress’s pad. In that moment of celebration, I was simply grateful and that was enough…more than enough and I was extremely grateful to have landed there. Don’t allow a disappointment of any size, shape or flavor to steal your joy, your gratitude to be alive and your Best Self mojo. And remember, calm = freedom.
Has anything tried to hijack your vibrancy lately? I’d love to hear how you reroute and rescript it. Please share in the comments below.