Where Does It Still Hurt?

As much as we like to be in control of our own destinies, steer the ship, chart the course, and all that blah, blah, blah – sometimes events (even little day-to-day ones) knock us for a loop and re-route us, or at a minimum, pull us off to the side of the road, leaving us with our emotional hazard lights blinking.  Now what?  When it boils down to taking full accountability of our circumstances – we start to dance around and pull magical excuses out of thin air…well, I certainly wouldn’t have manifested this circumstance in my life…and yet, on some cosmic level, you did.  But low and behold, it comes bearing gifts.  We may not be responsible for the actions of others, but we can question how and why we attracted people and events into our lives – asking ourselves what is the higher purpose they serve?  The more we practice mindful self-control, the easier it is to recognize when something is coming down the pike that needs our attention.  It also becomes easier to navigate our spiritual path from point A to point B.  As we become adept at recognizing our emotional triggers, the things that trip us up and oh-so-easily set us in a tailspin, the sooner we can get back on the path and keep on truckin’.And let’s be clear about something here.  As I said in last week’s newsletter, that bears repeating – there are no “wrong” turns, just turns.  Each in its own right will produce a result that you either desire or require (or more than likely a bit of both).  Sometimes we need to wallow in our anger, fear and self-pity in order to remind ourselves where we truly desire to be.  Because even when seduced by self-defeating untruths - no one truly wants to take up permanent residency alongside them.First stop: Identifying your triggers is the way out of this mess.In what aspect of your life do you feel vulnerable or harbor shame?• Relationships• Finances• Career• Self-careThe feelings are often so basic, that we dismiss them as insignificant.  I like to refer to my own as “unhealed little-girl-hurts” – but in calling them as such, in no way want to diminish their power in my energetic space.  Tracing back the discomfort of the present usually has roots in your long-ago past.  You may find a great reveal in allowing your own to surface.   It’s time to clear out that dusty old closet.  The answer lies within the question, “what is really going on underneath this emotional outburst I am experiencing?”Back to allowing yourself the space to feel what you feel - sometimes we just need to be one with the good, the bad and the ugly.  That’s when a time-out from the world around you is in order.  And it’s probably best to retreat to your own space – no conversation, no emailing, no communicating with others.  This is when the words of our emotions can take control and things get ugly.  I know you know what I’m sayin’!  Are you ready to take this stuff down?  Do you really want to put your money where your mouth is so you can refrain from repeating the same old self-defeating patterns? -Take a trigger tally.  Identify your trigger (s) – write it down, call this bully out and hold it to task-Identify a few ways it sneaks up upon you (What are the circumstances that tee this up?-Talk back to it. (Argue with your big bad self, present the opposing side)-Ask yourself what purpose it could be serving you in the big picture of your life. (Dig, it’s there)-What does it bring up for you – does it trigger other emotions and create a spiral-down?-Can you call out its untruths? (See it for the liar it is)-Can you flip it like a pancake, tell yourself a new story about it? (Tell the story that makes you sing, the one you really believe in) When we are dismissive with our emotions, with the way things land on us and make us feel – carrying on as if they don’t exist - they eat away at our spiritual selves like tooth decay.  Sorry, you’ve got to get up and brush those teeth.  When things repeat themselves, when we can identify patterns in our lives, we can then create a roadmap to a higher self, a best self.  Triggers are teachers.  I know we don’t always want to be in school, however, consciousness brings forth inner peace.On a walk this week I heard words coming out of my own mouth that I needed to be mindful of.  It was a safe space to share with a friend who often helps me re-route any negativity from creeping in.  I was able to step out of the conversation momentarily to listen to myself…UH OH, here you go again, slam on the brakes…don’t go down that path again.  Our words hold power and set intentions out into the Universe.  We create the momentum.  More often than not, they are steeped solely in speculation about someone else’s opinion of us or something else we cannot control.  The beauty in unraveling all of this is in the recognition.  It’s also ok to not know what to do with it.  Recognition doesn’t mean we have all the answers or solutions.  It simply means we are shining a light on it – taking the first steps – baby steps, all in the right direction.  When I caught myself, I called it out and I slammed on my brakes.  I didn’t beat myself up – I just took a moment to step out and observe what was going on.   Aaaah, there’s nothing like a good ‘ol time-out to soothe the soul.  Allow yourself that space.  Gift yourself this opportunity to shine into your most nurturing self.What little-girl-hurt do you have that still needs some tending to?Let the healing begin.