When the exterior world feels chaotic, the inner world is calling — allow yourself the time and space to reassess, recalibrate and reemerge
Go to your room! Do you remember when that was a bad thing, when your parents sent you off to your bedroom as a punishment?
Maybe I should go to my room and stay there for a while?
I recently came across this picture of myself in a pile of old family photos and just sighed when I saw it because, well, this pretty much sums up how I’m feeling right now.
Perhaps you can relate.
In this current world of upheaval and divisiveness I’d like to take a time out and just lay on the floor and suck my thumb surrounded by my toys — and not feel all the feels. Slam the door behind me. Leave me alone!
Like most of you, I’m feeling the weight of many things. And here in the U.S., well, we can see how that circus is playing out. But this isn’t a political post. No, this is about all the emotions beneath everything that is unfolding around us and most importantly, within us.
You’d have to be a stone not to feel it or be affected by it all — even if you are like me and have committed to refraining from the mainstream media rabbit hole.
The problem is that when we refuse to look at what’s happening and how it is impacting us — our responses come out sideways.
Our emotions have tentacles that attach to many things — all the stories, experiences and parts of ourselves that came before. It’s like following a roadmap from there to here. Anger for example is often rooted in fear. When our kneejerk reaction is to be enraged by something, we can instead try to ask ourselves, what’s going on here, what am I afraid of? I’m not suggesting that we dismiss our anger or any feelings, but I am suggesting we explore deeper to fully understand it (and ourselves).
That simple reframe can often be very telling. Witness how your body feels when you do that. Things can actually transform very quickly when we quiet ourselves. I’ve seen my own rage transform into a puddle of tears. Remember, rage is combustible. It needs to come out or it will find its way out and that’s when things can get ugly.
This has been such a complex time — and honestly, ‘complex’ doesn’t give it the gravitas that it deserves. The challenges of 2020, this global pandemic and our political unrest, aside from pretty much flipping our worlds upside down — have been a call to action. And let’s just say that if the first 2 weeks of 2021 have been an indicator of what’s to come, it doesn’t seem like things are slowing down in this department.
By action, I do not refer to gathering, rioting, aligning, finger-pointing, accusing and joining forces. This has actually been a call to go to your room, to go inward, to do YOUR work. This is a time to self-actualize. This isn’t about what the external world can provide for you.
How about you do YOU and I’ll do ME? How about you worry about cleaning up your toys and I’ll do the same? That’s the real work. I can’t change you and vice versa, no matter how much we try. But what we can do is lead by example and keep showing up in the world as our Best Selves. And those words aren’t platitudes. That’s the tough stuff. It’s easy to name call, align with only like-minded people and be unkind. It’s easy to create more pollution. That’s all low-vibe energy — and it’s easy to get caught up in it.
I’ve had my bratty moments along this path as things were taken away — things like my travel, my social life, my business events, my freedom to move about, to gather, to hug, to aimlessly wander through life…you get the point. You’ve likely got your own list. Throughout the months of my own resistance, I also worked hard to make my way through the muck — to make something meaningful of it all.
Now don’t get me wrong, I can’t wrap this one up in a sparkly bow. However, I can tell you that through all of this discomfort, I’ve had to face a lot about myself — what am I doing, what matters most, where am I going, what do I really want?
And I’m staring all my excuses down that I like to blame it all upon. Yep. There’s a new sheriff in town.
This is a time for discernment and deep self-reflection. It’s a time to locate your energy leaks. Where are you being drained? Who are you being drained by? Where do you need to do some repairs to plug those holes?
The answers aren’t out there. They aren’t found in a bottle of wine or any other form of self-medication. They aren’t found in vilifying others on social media. They aren’t found in being unkind, judgmental and accusatory. They are found by turning inward and asking what is my agenda.
So here’s my suggestion: Go to your room! And don’t come out until you’ve allowed yourself the time and space to unpack all of your feelings about this period of time that has created so much disruption in our lives.
Ask what it is trying to reveal to YOU. Ask what it wants YOU to see, where it wants YOU to go, what it wants YOU to do, what it wants YOU to heal.
Allow what needs to come forth. Create a safe place for yourself within that container to be with it, to feel it, to not feel compelled to explain it.
Honestly, my own heart hurts right now with the division, the sides, the pick-a-team mentality — even (and especially) amidst our own ‘wellness’ community. There is nothing ‘well’ about this. This is pollution. This is a waste of your precious energy and life force. It is a HUGE missed opportunity for our individual evolution and that of the collective.
It brings up the old ‘glass house’ adage…those in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. Who amongst us is without fault or wounding? I’ve witnessed much unkindness and judgment of others in my own community. I’ve been accused of being aligned with things I’m not aligned with. I see friends, colleagues, family members disassociating over differences of opinion.
When we lose the bandwidth to share ideas and beliefs with the people we care most about — we all lose.
You know what? I just learned an interesting fact about intuition. This isn’t woo woo. This is science. Did you know that your heart has its own nervous system called, the ‘heart brain’ — and the electromagnetic field of the heart is 5000x more powerful than the brain’s? This takes the notion of trusting your heart to a new level!
What is your heart asking of you?
So what if within this chaotic moment in time, we go to our rooms and we align with the truth of our own hearts? What if we get clear about our intentions and what we really believe? What if we get clear about what we can change and what we cannot change? I’m telling you…you’ll find your Best Self within that room. And another thing, I know when my world feels out of control, or my feelings are hurt, or I want to lash out at someone — I am being called to my room. Besides, I have also come to understand that the more I learn, the less I know. I’m a work-in-progress and I’m working it out, one day at a time, one feeling at a time, one prayer at a time. Care to join me?
Is your soul in need of a timeout? Perhaps you feel frazzled, worn down or pulled in too many directions? Let us know in the comments below how you are recalibrating and navigating these recent times.