We are born with a wisdom and connection to our deepest selves that gets dulled by the world — but it’s never too late to reclaim it
OMG, I know.
Just look at that smile, those barrettes, that outfit…ready to ride confidently off into the future. Marcia Brady called and she wants her look back. Ha.
This picture makes me smile. I was happy. I had big dreams and I was ready to seize the world by the handle bars of my Schwinn bicycle. I bet you have a version of this that you remember too — that part of you who had energetic plans and inspirations dancing in your head.
What happened? And where did that ‘YOU’ go?
Even the best laid visions get waylaid by life events and we can end up in relationships that aren’t healthy, jobs we feel stuck in and worse yet, swirling in limited thinking about what is actually possible.
That’s the true travesty here…self-doubt.
But you can always leave unfulfilling relationships and jobs…renegotiating with yourself is a whole other can of worms. That version of you can be difficult to break up with. I know.
I talk about this theme often because the truth is that it’s the crux of all that ails us — the ol’ ‘me, myself and I’ getting in the way again. We can easily identify the money pressures, the relational strain, the loneliness and disconnection, the lifeless jobs and careers we feel bound to, the destructive body image we hold…and the worst: the belief we maintain that change isn’t even an option.
But it always is.
Somewhere along the line we surrender our power and seeds of bitterness take root. We blame others and circumstances, meanwhile ignoring our connection to it all.
Mark my words, we have no issue tending to those seeds, but those are the wrong ones to fertilize.
Sure, life happens and along with it, events that reroute our plans. We’ve all been there. It can be jarring at first to do things differently and attempt to see it all through a new lens.
No one said, When I grow up I want to feel powerless, deflated and stuck…and yet, somehow we fall in line when one event or a series of events occurs. It’s mainly because we weren’t taught differently or given the tools to fan the fires of belief.
We all love a triumphant hero / heroine’s journey for a reason — it connects us to that part of us screaming out and saying, SEE, I told you. It IS possible, even for you.
I caught a few moments of a friend on a podcast recently where he mentioned how difficult it actually is to visualize what we want. It was so refreshing to hear that. It’s easy to say, I want more money. I want a healthier relationship. I want to be more connected to my work, etc. But visualization takes more than imagining end results. It requires feeling the end result, seeing it unfold and refraining from the negative thoughts, that like other bad habits — pop up to block the flow of inspiration.
That’s the tricky part — the place we need to take stock and ownership of. When we see how often we repeat these routines and we identify our pain points, we can then roll up our sleeves and start practicing something different.
And if you think this is just a bunch of self-help woo-woo…ask yourself what you have to lose by trying? At a minimum, you will feel better throughout your day. Then in turn, those happier, more positive thoughts can make way for new horizons — the kind of horizons where ideas bloom, we breathe easily and our true self feels safe enough to tip toe out from hiding.
Once upon a time there was a bright-eyed teenage girl who didn’t even imagine that sad outcomes were possible…and then she did.
But after some long-winded suffering of being caught on the spin cycle of self-destructive thinking — she decided to do something differently.
She got back up on that bike and road off into the sunset of what WAS possible.
And remember, they say you never forget how to ride a bike. Same goes with connecting to your best self. Seek and you shall find.
When you don’t like where the plotline is headed, keep in mind that it is possible to write a new chapter for yourself, a new ‘once upon a time’. It’s possible to edit characters out, to revise storylines and head off in a new direction. Remembering who we were helps us find our way back to ourselves in this moment.
And of course, dreams can shift and morph into new stories. They are not static and bound by limitations, other than those of our own lack of imagination and connection to self. When we connect the dots of dreams — past, present and future — we gather the pieces of ourselves, of our glorious journey to here…and then we get to assemble the parts in a configuration of our choice.
Use your pain, your fear, your disappointments, your shame, your frustration…don’t be used by them.
This is the masterful recipe of your glorious life in all of its spice, flavor and heat. When we recognize each ingredient as a necessary component of a larger orchestration — we can rescript how we see, feel and perceive not only where we’ve been, but what we are capable of.
PS: In celebration of one-of-a-kind you, go dig up a picture of yourself that makes you smile from the inside out, even if it’s a painful reminder of how you deviated off course. There’s no time like the present to reroute. Embrace that picture and remember — remember it all: your spirit, your belief, your superpowers, your childhood wishes and dreams.
Then ask yourself, what step am I going to take to reclaim a bit of that?
Once upon a time there was a you who had dreams that led you to here. Maybe it’s time to send out a ‘Thank You’ to him/her for the reminder.
People always consider what they would go back and tell their younger self…let’s consider instead what wisdom your younger self has to impart upon you. What part of you remains hidden away, yet hoping for a reunion? Share with us in the comments below.